Winning the War in Your Mind P7
Panel Discussion | 01 November 2026
Hosted by Chester with Gail, Faye, Jannie and Steve
Scriptures 1 Kings 19; 1 John 5:19; Proverbs 17:22; Galatians 5:1; Ephesians 4:23; Romans 5:17
After six weeks of exploring mental health and faith, Chester hosted a closing conversation with people from different parts of the Free Church community: Gail, a counsellor; Faye, a paediatrician; Jannie, a sports psychologist and performance mental coach; and Steve, an addiction recovery specialist. Their experience is different, but the panel returned to a shared invitation: be honest about struggle, seek the right support, and do not leave people to carry it alone.
Vulnerability makes room for connection
Gail reflected on the pressure some Christians feel to look as if they have everything together. When we hide the parts of life that feel messy, other people may assume they must hide too. Gail described how sharing something of her own story during the series opened a path for others to speak. Vulnerability does not mean telling everyone everything; it means there can be safe, appropriate ways to be honest and receive support.
Gail also spoke about shame and fear as forces that keep people silent. She described how shame can pull people towards hiding, while grace and compassionate connection can open a path towards healing. A listening friend does not have to fix the problem. Acknowledging someone’s pain and staying alongside them can be a meaningful beginning.
Gail described faith, counselling and community not as rival options, but as different kinds of support. Counselling may help someone understand what is happening and consider healthy boundaries; faith can sustain a person spiritually; and a community can offer encouragement and practical care—like a meal, a call or help finding the next step.
She also encouraged people to seek information and support when a relationship feels overwhelming, rather than trying to diagnose another person. Learning about respectful boundaries can help someone respond more safely and thoughtfully. A friend or Life Group can accompany someone, but should not be expected to become a therapist.
Notice sustained changes in children and teenagers
Faye reminded the church that children and teenagers can also experience mental-health difficulties. She encouraged parents and caregivers to notice changes over time in a young person’s mood, energy, interests, worry, friendships, school life, sleep, eating or physical wellbeing. A single difficult day is not a diagnosis, and many signs can have different causes; a change that persists or affects daily life is a reason to listen and consider professional guidance.
A calm conversation and a first appointment with a paediatrician or GP can help a family work out what support may be appropriate. Faye described care as potentially involving more than one kind of professional support. The right approach will differ from child to child, and parents do not have to work it out alone.
A person is more than their performance
Jannie spoke about performance pressure and the way children and adults can begin to tie their identity to results. Grades, selection, medals, or praise can matter deeply, but they do not measure a person’s worth. He encouraged parents and coaches to notice character as well as achievement. We can celebrate effort, honesty, courage, kindness, and growth.
The discussion also invites us to hold two things together: people can experience pressure differently, and some pressures are real features of the environments they live in. Building resilience should not mean dismissing a person’s distress or asking them to push through everything alone. Supportive adults can help young people name what is happening, develop skills and seek further help when needed.
Mental health and addiction can intersect in different ways
Steve spoke about the relationship between mental-health difficulties and addiction. For some people, alcohol or another behaviour may begin as an attempt to manage distress; for others, use may begin for different reasons, with mental-health difficulties appearing later or alongside it. There is no single story that explains every person’s experience, so it is important not to assume one cause or respond with shame.
Steve also challenged the idea that addiction is always obvious. Someone may keep functioning at work while their health, relationships, or home life are suffering. He described recovery as an ongoing process, involving more than a moment of sobriety. Support may involve recovery services, professional care, family, community and changes to daily patterns; the right combination is individual.
While the series ends, the conversation and the next steps continue
NOTICE, BRING, RENEW and LIVE. Notice what is changing; bring it honestly to God and a safe person; renew thoughts and rhythms; and take a next step towards a different way of living. That step might be prayer, a conversation, a Life Group, a GP, counselling or specialist recovery support. No one needs to do everything at once, and no one needs to share more than feels safe.
The panelists were sharing their own perspectives and experience, not setting out a single official Free Church position or giving individual clinical advice. Kindly respect professional boundaries and reach out to the church office or arrange an appointment with one of the panelist rather than seek an informal consultation at church on a Sunday.
Life Group Discussion Questions
Which moment or idea from the panel stood out the most and why?
Gail advised, “Don’t JADE; remove yourself; put up boundaries” when dealing with narcissistic behaviour. How can we take harmful behaviour seriously and set protective boundaries?
Jannie warned that agreeing with a child who says “it's not fair” can make them a “victim” or “entitled. How can adults build resilience while still listening carefully and taking a child’s experience of exclusion or unfairness seriously?
How can we encourage character and growth in children and adults, while also recognising real pressures around achievement?
What did you find most surprising about the stats Steve shared relating to addiction? See the self-assessment link below.
NOTICE, BRING, RENEW and LIVE. What is one next step that might help you or someone you support?
Helpful Resources
Self Assessments
Check out the free self-assessments on the Urban Recovery website
Steve Robinson— Soul Leadership
This book offers a revolutionary framework called the Soul-Leadership Cycle that transforms unprocessed trauma into leadership strength. It’s not just about surviving—it’s about emerging stronger and wiser through adversity.
Carey Nieuwhof — Leadership Podcast
Leadership expert and author Carey Nieuwhof defines burnout as a state where your passion and motivation suddenly vanish, leaving you feeling emotionally numb, exhausted, and unable to refuel even with rest. He experienced severe burnout 20 years ago after leading a fast-growing church for over a decade using an unsustainable formula of "more people equals more hours". He has written extensively about burnout and recovery and you can find more on his website, here are two links to get you started.
Madz Deyzel— Edify
EDIFY is an organization established by Madz Deyzel in 2019, founder of Grace Counselling, that partners with local churches to offer hope to communities struggling with mental health needs.
Check out these links below for more from Madz:
Dr Andy Yarborough — The Well Clinic
Dr Andy’s free resources include practical tools for emotional awareness, self-leadership and wholistic self-care. Particularly helpful are the Awareness Journal, Emotion and Parts Mapping, Holy Listening, and Rhythms of Wholistic Self-Care and Leadership.
Craig Groeschel
Winning the War in Your Mind — practical help for identifying destructive thought patterns and renewing the mind.
Heal Your Hurting Mind: Biblical Hope for Anxiety, Depression, Burnout, and the Emotions No One Talks About - with Dr Wayne Chappelle — Groeschel shares his own experience of anxiety and burnout alongside practical psychological tools and biblical hope. It is especially relevant to this series because it brings together faith, mental health, and professional wisdom.
Brené Brown
Atlas of the Heart — a helpful guide to understanding and naming our emotions, developing emotional language, and building deeper connections.
Peter Scazzero
Emotionally Healthy Spirituality - A helpful guide to integrating emotional maturity with Christian discipleship.
The Emotionally Healthy Leader - Particularly useful for leaders navigating stress, boundaries and sustainable service.
These resources are intended for reflection, growth, and conversation. They are not substitutes for professional counselling, medical care, or crisis support when you need them.
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